Connectedness and Separateness
The main idea behind connectedness and separateness is that when one person in a relationship wins then the other person loses. This creates a strain on the relationship according to Baxter and Montgomery.
Certainty and Uncertainty
In a relationship people want to be surprised. When you are able to predict every moment you will have with an individual then the relationship has lost its spontaneity and has become boring. This is where the idea of certainty and uncertainty comes into play. We want certainty in terms of knowing that the other person wants us yet at the same time we want a bit of uncertainty or mystery in the relationship to keep it interesting.
Openness and Closedness
Privacy and self-disclosure are the two key terms in understanding openness and closedness. It is said by Irwin Altman that privacy and self-disclosure operate in cyclical or wavelike fashions. Therefore, it is safe to presume that throughout a relationship there will be periods where privacy is more prevalent than self-disclosure and visa versa. Both are an important aspect of a relationship and the tensions that arise during the time span of the relationship.
To gain insight into another theory that is similar click here. This theory is similar in the concept of intimate communication, as in relational dialectics, and how what we say and the way it is said effects the person we are talking to from Social Judgement Theory.
To visit the research page of this theory click here.
To view an application of this theory click here.
To view a critique of this theory click here.
To return to the Interpersonal Communications 234 Homepage click here.