An Application of Social Penetration Theory
Created by: Kyle Croxton
Learning basic concepts of Social Penetration Theory can be very informative; however, one may still inquire how the theory applies to every day life. To gain a better understanding I have applied the theory to the idea of a first date. Those who have experienced a first date should easily relate to this application. For anyone who has yet to experience a first date, I have chosen an episode from the popular sitcom "Friends" where two first dates occur. This particular episode is number 215 and appeared during the second season of the show. The episode is titled "Racheal and Ross...you know" and offers examples which relate to the Social Penetration theory. To apply the show to the theory I chose the first date that occurs between Racheal and Ross(two characters who have been friends previously and decide to date.) As I pull examples from the episode one may view the actual script by clicking here.
How did Racheal and Ross gain relational closeness?
Taylor and Altman base their theory on the idea of how people develop closeness within a relationship. To encorporate their ideas they created the onion model which shows the layers which must be peeled away in order to create closeness in a relationship. Although the characters Racheal and Ross have already established a relationship in the sense of being friends one can note how they start over from the outer layer when they develope a romantic relationship. To make this concept even clearer I have applied examples of Racheal and Ross's fisrt date as they coordinate with some of the different layers of the "onion."
Biographical data...
The couple exchanges information that is normal of every day talk such as "Hi, how are you? How was your day?..." This is the layer where they flirt in a discrete manner and are careful about their body language toward each other in front of other people.
Superficial areas...
When reaching this layer Racheal dis-closes the information that she couldn't see the sub-titles of the movie they watched during their date because she did not want to have to wear her glasses on their first date. Within this layer as one can understand by Racheal's example of eye glasses people tend to admit to silly hang-ups that they may have.
Deeply held fears and fantasies...
Moving toward the inner layers of the onion Ross tells Racheal that he is self conscience about grabbing her butt due to the fact that she made fun of him when he first attempted to did so. Although this particular fear may not be deeply rooted people often share secrets and never before told stories at this layer in a relationship.
Concept of self...
The idea of sharing your self-concept with another is the inner most layer of Altman and Taylor's onion. Within this layer Ross explains to Racheal his reasoning behind not being able to grab her butt and explains to her that he feels stupid doing so. When people reveal to another how they view theirself they are usually reaching a high level of comfort in the relationship. Although this example deals with a comical situation and the dilemma is based on Ross grabbing Racheal's butt, one can still see how Social Penetration theory is relevant.
Other ways which Racheal and Ross's date relate to Social Penetration
One final comparison which one could take from Racheal and Ross's relationship is Altman and Taylor's idea of Outcome is determined by rewards minus costs. In making the decision to pursue a romantic relationship the two characters had to weigh the rewards against the cost. Before people decide to move from a friendship into a romantic relationship they this concept is a hot topic. In this episode of "Friends" we find that Racheal and Ross decide that the rewards of a romantic relationship outweigh the costs.
From the simple example of a sitcom episode we are able to view the real life application of Social Penetration theory just as it occurs in everyday life. Although the example refers to made-up characters many can relate to the issues that the theory addresses and use the theory to help themself better understand their own relationships.
To view more information on Social Penetration theory one can return to our home page by clicking here.
If interesting in viewing more background information on the sitcom one can visit a "Friends" website by clicking here.
If you would like to view another application of Social Penetration theory take a look at Kevin's application by clicking here.
This page was last updated by Kyle Croxton March 15, 2000.